I know it sounds crazy right? I mean, is it really possible for two women to have what would be deemed a “healthy” relationship? After years of failing miserably, I have began to wonder about that very same question. I would consider myself a pretty emotionally intelligent person. I’m great at communicating, always honest, and only slightly afraid of intimacy. So what the hell is the matter with me? I’m realizing now that I’m reading this book, that the same thing is wrong with me that is wrong with every woman who had to learn how to love on their own. What is love anyway? What is a “normal” relationship? Do they exist? If they do, how to we go about making it work for us? All of these questions are floating around the minds of millions of women everywhere. Thanks to Dr. Clunis and Green, we don’t have to wonder anymore.
I had bought this book several weeks, if not months ago. I had attempted to read it once or twice but was always pulled away. In light of my most recent failure, I thought perhaps it was time to really examine myself in relationships. I needed to understand something that hadn’t been taught to me in my dysfunctional upbringing. I am now in a position where I refuse to continue the insanity of creating the same kinds of situations over and over again. I am ready to be whole on my own and not expect another to make up for my inadequacies. Though this amazing journey I have begun is still tempered by mourning and loneliness, it is more often filled with the joys of freedom. I know now that I have the right to choose a different way than I experienced growing up. I know now that I have the right to choose a different way than my most recent experience. I also know now that if I look for the answers, they will find me.
I’m not quite yet half-way through this book and I already highly recommend it. If you want to choose sanity and peace over insanity and turmoil, if you want to choose love and acceptance over insecurities and emotional violence, if you want to choose to finally have the kind of relationship you always imagined you could have, read this book.
Seriously, for less than the cost of two lattes at Starbucks you can be on your way to girl on girl relationship bliss. Now doesn’t that sound better than all of the drama? You bet it does!
For more information, or to order a copy:
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Amazon.com Review
Surely there are couples who don’t need books like this: blessed as they are with flawless unions, enduring passion, and equitable chore distributions, with never a sharp word, a demanding ex-lover, or a roving eye. The rest of us can consult Clunis and Green every 45 minutes. With sections on building intimacy, making decisions, communicating, and addressing issues of race and age difference, among other topics, Lesbian Couples at least touches on most of the conflicts that a lesbian couple will face (a list of resources at the back will help readers pursue specific interests). The chapter on conflict resolution is exceptional, but the chapter on sex seems brief and perfunctory by comparison, perhaps because it has been written about so extensively elsewhere. This major revision of a lesbian self-help classic may be illuminating not only for couples but also for single women hoping to build the qualities needed for successful relationships, especially in the wake of a break-up. –Regina Marler
