I think I’m falling in love with you.

Ok. I have a few confidential secrets I’d love to get off my chest.

*I get so friggin’ tired of my partner repeating everything two or three times. I heard you already!

*the reason why i drink is because i cant stand to be myself some days.

*why do you drive me crazy sometimes, and then i absolutely adore you at other times

I have a couple of “lesbian” friends who have “switched.” I don’t ask, they usually tell me the same thing…drunk, horny, and those guys happened to be there. I think so is my vibrator?! I wonder this. I have thought about being with guys, but I have the desire of fucking them, yes in the ass. I asked a fellow who said it was ok to ask such a personal question, and then he ran away and would not talk to me for the rest of the evening. I just wonder if guys are really open to getting fucked, cause sometimes I wanna do the fucking!

There are times like this when I feel alienated from the world.

I don’t know if I belong here.

My choices are unpopular.

My path rarely traveled.

My heart is sad today.

I’m feeling alone.

Sometimes I wonder why I’m here at all.

Is any of this worth it?

You’re not mine and I know this.you try to hide it,but I can see it…I don’t know why you keep coming back to me. We have this connection that is so electrifying its hard to resist, I think that’s why you come to me instead of her. We have this silly,new love brewing, nervous yet comfortable connection.
My first memory of a spark was when we met the 3rd time and even though there were tons of people at the bar, our eyes always found each others,and a shy smile always took over my lips. I moved towards the bathroom and as I waited I felt a hand on my arm,of course it was you. Read the rest of this entry »

Confident as a woman lover. I must say I get quite amused by the hetero sex. I’ll share a very recent experience with you. I met up with a couple, new friends, male and female, both beautiful and passionately erotic. We started the evening at her industrial condo, candles, sake, sushi, music, and paint art, experienced. The tingle was in the air, no words had to be spoken. The laughs, the fixated eyes, the body gestures…the request to play. Pounce, Touch, bite, grasp, grope, rub, grind, suck, nip, tug…fuck. My request was simple. I will watch you two fuck. I am not one who watches porn. I do feel that there is a difference between watching it on TV and in front of your eyes, for you. This was for me. I am known to be a voyeur. Read the rest of this entry »

When I was about twelve years old I saw a show with my family about predictions for the future of the world. One segment explained how the world was going to blow to pieces in the year 2000. That night I laid in bed calculating just how long I had until I was going to die. I was going to die at sixteen. Oh man, sixteen, that is an important age. I had been planning for years all the things I was going to do at sixteen; but, since I was going to die only one thing mattered. I could not die a virgin. Read the rest of this entry »

I have everything that I could possibly need. Yes, I’m blessed in many areas. I have a man, and yes, he treats me so well that I couldn’t really ask for more. But lately I’ve been having these curiosity’s that’s been working my brain. I’m heterosexual (as far as I know)..lol…but I have a stronnnng attraction for beautiful women. He knows this. But that’s about all that he knows. He doesn’t know that I fantasize and have dreams about women. And that sometimes I’d even imagine what it’s like to be with one sexually, just to confirm whetha it’s JUST a curiosity, or something more. Read the rest of this entry »

my whole life i’ve felt like a stranger in my own body. now that i am finally comfortable with my butchness, my life has taken a greater twist than i ever imagined. it’s amazing to be who i am and to know who i am and not give 2 shits what anyone thinks…

My heart is breaking. I don’t know how much more I can take.